Thursday, September 14, 2006

Conservative Women and Tiny Clothes

Starting another one of those never ending gender wars? Nope.. Today we’ll be talking about the “conservative-kuno” attitude of women (specifically Filipina women). “Conservative-KUNO” (“Kuno” means unrealistic, false, fraud) Whoops! Note: Before you girls go gaga and start a massive manhunt for yours truly, read this; This issue was proposed to me by a girl who got bigger and wider ideas, and is certainly enjoying, being a girl. Yes ladies, you heard me right. Think of it as me being her or her being me or whatever! So drop those raised eyebrows and lets start pressing this issue.

To begin with, let me share an experience that happened few weeks ago. I took a PUJ (Public utility jeep or jeepney) ride on my way to school. I noticed this man sitting next to me getting all excited and hyped up (I guess someone made a mistake discharging this patient from the mental health hospital too soon). I wonder what’s making this freak uneasy; he is really starting to get into my nerves. Then I noticed, he kept staring at something.. Oh shoot! Now I know what’s making him look like he’s got ants on his pants(Psycho maniac). Sitting opposite him is a lady wearing something, I don’t know what you call it, but something provocative, a clothing covering half or maybe only a third of her breasts. I didn’t mind. Maybe the lady doesn’t mind at all. Few minutes later, I heard a loud slap. I thought one of the jeep’s tire blew off. Then there was screaming and shouting next to where I was sitting. Its the lady going berserk over the maniac who kept peeping underneath her clothes. (And I thought she didn’t mind.) So, how did world war three came to an end? The maniac took off the jeep. (I guess he tried catching another ride, loser.) And the lady (As what most ladies often do.) unstoppable mumblings. (deeb.. deebideep.. beep.. Im an alien and I find it difficult to understand your language with a hundred words per second.) add up those usyoseros and usyoseras saying “Hay pag ako ikaw, hindi lang un ang inabot ng gagong yun” (If I were you that bastard would get more beating than that.) and other stuffs like that.

Alien to Lady: You’re annoying me. Your enemy took off. What’s the point of mumbling about what happened? Want me to zap you with my lazer gun? (What a bitch.)

Alien: Di bee dy, bee si dee, em pi tri.. mura lang.. Lazer gun ba? meron ako puwede hulugan five gives..

Back to pressing issues. I know you guys think I shouldn’t have call that bitch a bitch or bitch bitch.. whatever! Everyone on that jeep took side with the lady except me. Its not because I got irritated with her witchy screams and all that. Come to think of it, will that incident happen if that girl wore those kind of clothing in the first place? This incident do happen everyday. Have you seen ladies wearing tees they call “hanging” and kept pulling it down to prevent showing their skins? Why wear that kind of shit in the first place? How about those V-neck, Plunging necklines? You girls think you look cool in it, then afterwards you hold your handkerchief against your chest to cover those things you call cleavage. My ass! Low rise jeans and being conscious about someone seeing your underwear’s strap? Nah ah?! What are you trying to tell the world with your fashion statements?? Crap! Keep doing that. You girls look funnier than clowns. I mean, what’s the point of wearing those kind of clothing when you feel uneasy and uncomfortable anyway? It is the issue; Don’t act like you’re one of those modern, liberated women or trying to look like one if you can’t handle it. Some of you might say it is because men are perverts by nature, were just protecting ourselves from those kind. But hell no! Men are just plain good at appreciating beauty, art. What if we guys are staring at your humps because we just simply admire them with no malice at all? Its like saying “Hi friend.. Ang ganda ng cleavage mo ha?” would you say “Salamat!”? No! no.. no.. no.. Instead we get a double, triple slap and a crunchy “BASTOS!” What if the guy isn’t a real guy? like; “Friend ang ganda ng boobs mo.. Inggit ako” You really wont know what’s on a man’s head, so what’s the hasty action for? What if my psycho-maniac-co-passenger-number-one-loser wasn’t really thinking anything malicious about staring at the girl’s tits? What if it just reminds him of something special? childhood for example. What if the tits remind him of the unending love and nurturing of his mother who might have passed away? No one knows, no one really knows. Poor bastard, silenced forever.

Two thumbs up for the women who’s preserving the traditional ways and keeping it real. Two thumbs up for those modern, liberated Filipinas who knows how to hustle and play. And a middle finger up for those bitches who don’t know where to place themselves.

I’m just playing ladies.. You all know I love you.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

wow this blog is great!
i juz made realizations after reading this,..
i can relate myself to the topic, nice!
hope other people would also notice this one,..
keep it up patutix!!^^

Anonymous said...

that's nice!
conservative women really deserve two thumbs up!